


Can't You Hear It...The Voices?

by Love_Stylinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Caring Harry, CryingLouis, Emotional Louis, Hallucinations, Larry relationship development, M/M, Schizophrenia, Smut...maybe, Suicide thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-12
Updated: 2014-01-21
Packaged: 2017-12-19 05:43:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/880106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Love_Stylinson/pseuds/Love_Stylinson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis isn't crazy he isn't, he was fine until one day he heard it. The little whispers in his ear, the soft voice telling him things, bad things. The boys are starting to think somethings wrong with him. But Louis merely asks..<br/>"Can't You Hear it?" Harry's the only one who answers, "Hear what Boo?" Louis looks at them, "The voices." It gets bad really bad to the point where Louis just wants to kill himself, the voices in his head are telling him it's for the best..will he do it or will Harry and the boys be there for him. Larry development for sure c:</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

Prologue   
Do it Louis...

You know you want to...

Nobody would miss you if you did...

Jump Louis, it's right there just do it, spotlight is on you...

Look at Harry...

How perfect he is...

He wouldn't fall for you..

Fucking freak you are...

He'll never love you...

He will never love you...

Look at the fans Louis..

There screaming at you..

They want you to jump...

They'll catch you Louis...

Jump Louis...

Your a freak Louis..

No one will love a freak..

Like you...

Harry's looking at you Louis..

Turn your head...

Look how beautiful he is in the stage light..

Look hows pretty his is compared to you...

He's not crazy like you are...

“Louis we love youuuuu!!!!”

Here that Louis they hate you...

“No,” Louis says into the mic, right in the middle of the song.

They hate you your crazy..

Don't you hear them...

Louis blinked down at the fans from the stage, all the girls screaming, shouting, chanting those words...those hateful words.

“Louis you suck!”

“Untalented prick!”

“Ugly twat.”

“We haaaaaate you Louis!”

Ya see ahaha they hate you..

You untalented ugly twat....

Oh look the music stopped Louis...

It's so quiet...

Jump Louis...

Do everyone a favor and do it...

Louis looked at the crowd and back to the boys who were staring at him. He vaguely heard Harry's voice asking if he was okay. But the voices in his head were overriding everything else, they were telling him things. Yelling, screaming..... he took a step forward towards the edge of the stage he looked down.

S'long way down huh..

Do it Louis..

Fall..

Slip...

Do us a favor Lou...

Jump Louis...

Jump Louis...

Jump...

The voices

Swirling around in his head...

He hated it, he didn't want to feel like this...

He threw a glance at the boys and noticed them walking towards them.

JUMP!

So he did...


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo here it is, after like what? months of putting this on hold I've finally got it together c:

Part One

It's been a good day for Louis, the best he's had all week. He hasn't heard the voices in over two days and that was a record. He was enjoying the absence of it, actually he was reveling in it. It relieved the tension that was crowded on top of his shoulders. He could finally relax and enjoy his day with the boys like usual. 

They were sitting backstage now, all hyped up from performing. He saw Niall and Liam joking around, and heading back to there rooms to get there things. While Zayn was already ready to leave, just chilling on the couch next to him. Louis looked around curiously, trying to figure out where Harry was. He was usually always next to him, because well him and Louis did things together....always. When he was ready to leave for something, Harry was to. If Louis' hair and makeup was done for a show, Harry's was to. 

Everything was LouisandHarry and that's how Louis liked it. But recently Harry's been acting a little off lately, or maybe it was just him. Louis sank a little further into the couch, because he hoped that Harry wasn't mad at him or something. With Louis it could've been anything that he did, like; leaving his shoes everywhere at the hotel, not picking up his clothes off the floor, or the time he accidentally knocked Harry's plate of food out of his hands yesterday. 

'Or maybe it's because he has to live with your annoying ass all day'.

Louis physically flinched hearing the malicious voice ringing in his ears. He clenched his eyes shut, willing it to go away. He was so sure this time that they went away for good, but here he is. Shaking on the couch from hearing such negative thoughts being tossed around his head. He nearly jumped out of his skin when a hand touched his shoulder, “Louis you okay?” Louis opened his eyes to see Zayn staring at him with a worried look on his face.

Louis let out a long sigh before he nodded his head, “Yeah Z I'm fine.” he mumbled under his breath. Zayn still gave him a look but went back to looking at his phone. Louis rubbed at his eyes, suddenly tired and wanting to go back to the hotel. He curled up further into the couch, trying to shut his mind off, trying to ignore the voices in his head. 

It wasn't always like this, the voices he means. They weren't always there, but Louis could tell you the exact day it started. When he tried out for the X-Factor and saw Harry for the first time. Louis noticed himself at how he would stare at Harry a bit to long, how he wanted to just be wrapped up in the taller boys arms all day. How he....how he wanted Harry to kiss him, and whisper sweet nothings in his ear while they made love. But the voices were always there, taunting him and teasing him, always.

'So you're gay now?'

'That's not normal at all.'

'Didn't your mother teach you better?'

'Freak'

 

The voices continued on when a girl asked them if they were dating during an interview one time. It was such a random question back then, one that Louis thought was quite funny. But to Harry, he acted like the world was coming to an end, the look on his face. Louis would never forget that, it was a split second that he saw, but he did. Harry just laughed it off, showing off that charming smile of his saying, “Me and Lou? Pssh never.” He wrapped an arm around Louis, “Were just good mates, yeah?”

Louis knew that Harry didn't like him like he did, he knew that. But hearing Harry say it out loud like he did that day, completely broke Louis' heart. That was first time he ever cried over the harsh whispers in his ear.

'Like Harry Styles would ever like you, are you crazy?

'Didn't you see the look on his face?'

'The poor boy was appalled at the mere thought.'

Louis remembers that day and he would never forget it. He remembered crying his eyes out as soon as they got off the stage and all the boys were worried about him. Niall, Zayn and Liam all asked what was wrong, trying to comfort him. But all Louis could focus on at the time was that Harry wasn't there, he wasn't there to stop his tears like he always does. Harry was always there and the day he wasn't, broke Louis' heart even more. 

Ever since that day he tried to suck it up and seem like it didn’t matter to him. But the more he tried to push it to the back of his mind the more frantic the voices got. It was scary, it was really fucking scary when it would start and it would never stop sometimes. He would lay in the hotel beds, curled up into a ball, crying softly so that he wouldn’t wake up Harry.

'Someone so pathetic like you would cry over some bullshit like that hmm?'

Louis clenched his eyes shut trying to block it out, not wanting the voice to ruin there last concert. When he heard no more he slowly opened his eyes to see the boys looking at him. Niall was first to speak his face showing concern, “Are you okay Lou, ya look kind of out of it today?” 

“Are you sick?” Zayn piped.

“You do look kind of pale.” Liam said coming over to feel Louis’ head. Louis batted Liam’s hand away picking up the mic that was laying next him. “You guys I’m fine nothing to worry about, yeah?” he reasoned. The boys went quiet giving him a look that says something was clearly not okay with Louis. However the boys always know when not to push him, when he doesn’t want to be bothered.

“Alright boys you’re on in three.” 

They all stood up and headed towards the spots under the stage. While waiting for the cue, Louis couldn’t help notice that Harry didn’t say anything or asked if he was okay. Was he that annoying that Harry didn’t even want to waste a breath on him. He wasn’t trying to be so needy, he didn’t want to be. However with things going as they are right now, Louis wasn’t sure how long the boy would overlook this. 

He shook his head, ridding all of the negative thoughts rolling around in his head. There was a shout before the little light above them turned green. All of the boys popped up standing tall, with their mics in their hands. The crowd was loud, girls screaming everywhere, glittery posters high above there heads. Louis would never get used to this, this rush of excitement, adrenaline rushing through his body as he stood on stage.

“New York are you readddyyyy!!!!” Liam’s loud voice boomed throughout the stadium. 

The crowd screamed back in answer, making the boys laugh. “Alright you guys were gonna sing one of our newest songs.” Harry says, and Louis looks over to see the boy smiling brightly, waving out to the crowd.

Louis hears Niall say something but it’s drown out by the yells and screams from all the girls. The cue for Better Than Words starts up and Harry jumps forward, belting out the first part of the song. After hearing Harry’s sweet deep voice, Louis’ boy is on auto pilot. He jumps around, smiles and messes around with the other boys until his first part comes up.

It’s not till during the chorus of the song that Louis catches Harry eyes. For once Louis could see that little twinkle in Harry’s eyes, and it made his heart jump. Harry hasn’t looked at Louis like that in a very long time, and it feel so foreign to see that he almost forgets to smile back. But before he could even lift his lips he hears it, the little voice in the back of his head, whispering.

Louis tries hard, he really really tries hard to ignore it, because he second solo is coming up. He shakes his head a little before opening his mouth to sing, the lyrics coming out smoothly. He catches Harry’s eyes again, and his heart skips a beat, and then suddenly he feels sweaty.

'Now, now Lou don’t go getting ideas again, yeah?'

'Don’t get ahead of yourself just because he looked at you.'

'It doesn’t mean anything...he’s probably faking anyway.'

Louis didn’t realize he stopped singing until Niall was in front of his, calling his name. Louis wasn’t sure though, the blonde was so far away. The voices were so loud in his head and all he could register were the hateful words being thrown around. His noticed his breath started coming short and he wasn’t sure which was up and which was down. 

“Mate?”

“Louis?”

“Hey Lou!!!”

Everyone was shouting and he didn’t like it, he didn’t like all the screaming in his head. He wanted it to stop, he wanted everything to stop! Suddenly he was on the ground, the world tipping to the side, the mic rolling out of his palm. Look at you! You are the most sorry person I ever met!

'What’s got your panties in a twist huh?'

'Can’t take the heat?'

“M...Make it s....stop!” Louis cried, his voice cracking at the end. He can’t handle all of this, all of this shouting, the screaming, he wanted silence, for once in his life he just wanted things to be quiet.

He was aware that people were surrounding him now, and was he crying? “Louis you need to calm down!” 

That was Liam he thinks for a minute, but he wasn’t sure. His vision was so blurry and his throat felt like it was collapsing on itself. “I don’t think he’s even breathing!!!!” Niall shouts.

'Look at this, look at all the trouble you’re causing.'

'Nothing but failure.'

'You messed up the last show!!!'

'The last concert for months and it’s you who fucks it up.'

'Well woulda ya know?' 

Louis starts to scream them, screaming for the voice in his head to shut up. Crying his eyes out, the anguish, the complete terror he’s feeling washing over his body, making it seize. The last thing that Louis remotely remembers are big hands caressing his back, green eyes filled with tears and a deep voice telling him that everything will be okay.

'If that isn’t the biggest lie of the year, then I don’t know what is.'

**Author's Note:**

> Comment&Kudos


End file.
